I seem to be getting a good deal of criticism lately -- and just as we wind down the tourist season.
It's great to be here in Niagara Falls.
I have observed that in Niagara Falls, my critics rarely bother to tell me personally about their criticism of me. They tell it to the press. And I get to read about it there.
That makes it fun.
One of my critics is Candra Thomason, a council person, who told the press that the tents on my grounds look "tacky."
In our defense, there are about a dozen people making extra income this year -- on our grounds -- and in our lobby -- people who would not otherwise be making money from tourism. Instead, most of that money would go to corporations like Delaware North and Maid of the Mist Inc. by way of its gift store.
I understand people are unhappy. At the park, disposable cameras cost $15. We sell them for $7. The Park sells keychains for $7; we sell them for $3. At the park, a boiled hot dog sells for $5. At One Niagara, they are $2.
And the park, not us, is the attraction.
Still, it has been said the State Park (i.e. Albany) has "hogged" -- no, let me say it gently -- "managed to derive" almost all the profits from tourism, diverting, wherever possible, tourists away from the city or its businesses, and into the park directly.
This year, a dozen local people will make some money from tourism in "tacky tents," or in a "honky-tonk" lobby. Next year, it might be 100.
One Niagara is a little like your ugly, teenage sister who your friends once mocked. But next year, when her acne disappeared, she grew up and filled out a little and she learned how to dress and how to speak, they all stood in line to have a dance with her.
In answer to the elegant Ms. Thomason, I took down the vinyl and bought expensive, canvas tents, but my vendors did not like them, so I took down the tents. But the sun was too hot, so I put one back up.
I felt like the man leading a donkey who was told, alternately, to ride the donkey, to have his son ride the donkey, have he and his son ride the donkey, and finally to carry the poor donkey. He tried to please everybody, and wound up losing the donkey.
Ms. Thomason is running for re-election and needs a "donkey," or, to say it elegantly, a platform.
When the Small Business Association moved to Buffalo, taking 200 jobs out of Niagara Falls, Ms. Thomason said not a word. When the EPA's Public Affairs Office moved from Niagara Falls, she was mute.
On tacky tents, she has lots to say.
My good luck is to be here in Niagara Falls, where you can learn so much about human nature.
Another critic I have never met is Mr. Chris Glynn, the president of The Maid of the Mist Inc. He was critical of the fact that I parked a total of a few dozen cars on a couple of busy weekends in a hole I am now filling (which is nearing 50 percent completion, by the way).
I have often wondered how one company can have the monopoly for boating in the world's most famous river -- at its most visited spot, no less. No doubt, Mr. Glynn has done everything to make his grounds and boats beautiful. With millions of paying customers and multi-millions in annual revenue, one expects greatness from the Maid of the Mist.
No doubt, also, Mr. Glynn gets many opportunities to help his poorer cousins in Niagara Falls rise up, and quite possibly he has been generous. I'd like to make a humble suggestion. If he wishes to continue his largess, by my simple calculations, if Maid of the Mist Inc. gave 50 cents per ride toward the beautification of downtown Niagara Falls, there would be no inelegant stone, turned or unturned, or tacky tent outside the park. There would never be an unfilled pit where cars inelegantly park.
Still, he might wish to conserve. I heard some Native Americans may challenge Maid of the Mist when its exclusivity is up for renewal. Tax-free nations and monopolies on rivers are great things to own. As it stands, I just own a vacant building in Niagara Falls, and am trying to figure out what to do to develop tourism, and not go broke.
Meanwhile, Mr. Glynn's uncle, Donald, of the Niagara Gazette, joined my critics. Don Glynn is one of the finest writers our community has ever known, and he has an encouraging word for the new NTCC visitor center which, he says, is staffed by volunteers, and where, Mr. Glynn happily quotes, "people can even make reservations for a tour."
What is good for the gander (NTCC), selling tours, is not as pleasing when it comes to the goose (me). He writes of my building, "Tourists ... are greeted by a large "Information" sign ... Shortly after walking into the lobby, however, they discover that most of the space is devoted to a gift shop, snack bar and souvenirs. As you might expect, there is a counter where sightseeing tours are sold."
What should be mentioned is that tours are lucrative for NTCC; it collects 40 percent commission on each. They are sold not by volunteers, but salespeople paid commissions.
Originally, NTCC wanted space in One Niagara. Their condition of free rent was problematic. I opened my own information center.
I cannot tell you how much fun I had making maps for tourists to use for self-guided tours. I just finished one of the 11 river islands to explore in the upper Niagara. As you might expect, we do not just sell tours.
Our policy -- and NTCC's -- is to inform tourists how to enjoy the Falls, self-guided or guided. But it was my good luck to earn money from tours, instead of giving away free space. The tour company pays a commission, which offsets expenses like paper products and maintenance in our restrooms, which remain open to the public after park restrooms are closed.
Mr. Glynn notes my lobby's appearance (which I think is beautiful): "At a glance, the entire first floor is honky-tonk, not what you'd expect across the street from a park designed by Frederick Law Olmsted."
Actually, we are not across the street from a park whose design is Olmsted's. My building is across the street from the park's 300-car parking lot. Olmsted did not design large areas for parking, gift stores and restaurants -- which now take up much of his all-green-space design.
As for the "honky-tonk" motif, the city was built on it, and, it was not until Mayor Lackey decided to tear it down and rebuild it with elegant, high-class establishments -- a plan that never materialized -- did tourism die.
We went from profitable honky-tonk to an inelegant nothing.
Another wonderful critic whom I have the pleasure to read about in the newspaper is the city administrator, the upright Col. Daniel Bristol. His issue is parking.
The administrator says ordinances say the City alone has the right to profit from parking.
My attorney, civil rights expert David Jay, questions the constitutionality of an ordinance whereby government sets up in business, then makes a law prohibiting others from getting into it. What if the city gets into souvenirs? Will they pass an ordinance that no one but they can sell these?
As to my parking, a young man makes his extra money for his family by parking about 20 to 30 cars a day, which he splits with me.
One city official said he might have the police arrest him. This shows a woeful lack of knowledge. Parking cars on private property is not a violation of the penal law. It's a civil matter to be decided by a judge.
And they told me it would be easy to develop in Niagara Falls.
Is it an oxymoron -- "Develop in Niagara Falls"?
Another pleasing critic is Tom Christy, who hosts a cable TV show.
He has been criticized often for his political dealings, and allegations made against him in Albany were probably unfair. But apparently he does not like the tent. Since I have not watched TV for 30 years, I can't say for certain what he said. But I'm told he had a tirade. About a tent.
Now, I know Tom well, and I know he does not have to earn a living, being supported by his noble wife, but I just wish he would come over some time and see how hard these vendors work -- sometimes 20 hours a day.
Still, you get to enjoy people criticizing you on TV, and in newspapers, without ever talking to you -- just when you're starting out. You say, "This is Niagara Falls."
Only the strong survive.
Thus spake the philosopher to his disciples: "We are not weak, and if you are weak, it is because you love your own weakness."
Or, "Let them talk ill of me, if they like, but let them talk. That is my motto."
I mean, it's great to be here in Niagara Falls.

Frank Parlato invites you to stop by One Niagara or call 804-3304 for more information.